We Are Fortunate

Snapshots of random cases

Case 1 - between Me and W

ME : Karang pukul 2 kita bawa Ms. A ke Brunei Museum, Alat Alat Kebesaran dan Kg Ayer ah.

W : Muzium tau tu ku tapi apa kan Alat Alat Kebesaran ani? Di mana tu ah?

Even after sketching W a proper map with detailed markings pun W got lost driving.
I had to give me instruction (over the phone) while W drives.


Case 2 - between Me and X

ME: Karang patang kita bawa saya and Ms. B ke Bumbungan Dua Belas ah..

X : Dimana tu ah?

Once we arrive, oh...ada rupanya bangunan di sini ani.


Case 3 - between Me and Y

ME: Karang pukul 7 kita ambil kedia and bawa ia ke Centrepoint ah.

Y: Centrepoint? Dimana tu ah? Inda ku tau tu.

ME: Di gadong..sebelah hypermart

Y: Eh, takut tu sasat eh. Hypermart ani dimana?

I later found out that he only knows the place as Jaya as in Jaya Hypermart.

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Initially, I was surprised, wondered and questioned....how can a Bruneian not know what and where is the Royal Regalia?
And where is Centrepoint/Hypermart? Where Bumbungan Dua Belas is?...and this is only a few of the cases...

While I explained and drew the map (and yes, my map is correct..;p)..I really stressed to them how important it is to know the location of all these places and where to park...I mean how can u not know that theres parking spaces across the Royal Regalia???

Initially, in my head, I was like...'Astaga, cemana nie durang inda tau ani?' Inda kan inda tau???

Later on, once everything is done and as I lay my head on the pillow waiting to doze off...I reflected upon everyting that had happened during the day...

I find myself feeling sad...how can one not know the basic information and location of your own country? I mean its a different case if youre ignorant and if you forgot, but if you dont know...thats a different thing. my heart goes out to them.

We are fortunate. Sometimes I realized that unintentioanlly I can be selfish and take things for granted.
I forgot that not everyone is bless and as fortunate as others.
I forgot some are more blessed than others...while some have to learned the hard way.

I've mengusut and nagged about not being able to do get certain things, not able to save up a certain amount of $$ etc etc etc...but how about the others..who are less blessed and less fortunate?

How about those who have to survive with $500 a month while for others that is the amount they are paying for their car on a monthly basis..or to fulfill their hobbies / interest.

How about the people who are not able to be choosy and picky about what they eat because that is all they can afford?

How about families to have to stay and survive in very small, packed spaces while there are other families who enjoy more spaces than they can ever use sufficiently??

Well, this is just a reminder to self.

For me not to complain about life soo much when there are others who are far less fortunate

For me not to take things for granted

For me not to lose sight of things

For me to stay 'down-to earth' and nto be selfish

and for me not to judge others based on what they dont know.

These are all simple things in life..but it is very important and will make a huge difference.

Whether or not we are less or more fortunate than others, lets pray that we will see pass those differences and be given the strength to withstand challenges that comes our way. Amin!!

xxx

Its been a good day :)

• I woke up at 10am.
• cleaned the room
• swept the house
• did laundry

I should say doing housechores have been quite relaxing and refreshing especially when im not rushing against time and everyone around were relaxed :)

I even take the time and effort to straighten my hair...only to be spoiled by the rain...it went freezy again. so I thought ok lah, alang alang...so I just went to unload the rubbish (i was initially planning to wait till the rain to stop).

Anyway, had late lunch di Swensen with my beau and had a relaxing conversation.

Went to qlap to buat jeans (finally!!) I remembered my last jeans tore during rehearsal for Ibu's 60th birthday...hahaha.

And what else can u do when its raining except cruising around and thats exactly what we did..:)

I finally, had a glimpse of the Mangrove Paradise Resort. it doesnt look too bad. On the way in, I could see the fish farm where people can go fishing. The resort was all lit up and I could say there were more than 15 cars at the parking lot.

Should try the food there next time.

And I also got a surprise from the beau. I got a rose :) Its been ages since I received one...I love it ;p

-the end-

xxx

YOU...

LEAVE ME ALONE!!

STOP SEARCHING FOR OTHERS MISTAKES..

TAKE A MOMENT...

AND LOOK AT YOURSELF.


SIGNING OFF,
ME...
REPRESSING ANGER!!

2010 – PART ONE

As we are approaching the end of 2009, I’m starting to think what 2010 holds for me.

After all the roller-coaster rides since 2007, I do hope 2010 is going to be a good and better year for my families, ME, my love life, my social life, and lastly of course, my work life. Amin!!!

I guess if I have to describe 2009 in one word, it has been a ‘DISCOVERY’ year.

This is the year I discovered the following:

• I have one or two or three….good, reliable friends… Thank God I have them around :)

• I have a temper…especially when I want to. It reminds me of M.

Her temper comes and goes quickly. Like this temper I am experiencing: Sometimes it scares me. Sometimes it’s a weird feeling. Sometimes it’s funny. Sometimes I get so angry that I forgot why was I angry in the first place…don’t you think that is weird??

• The older I get, the less patience I am…;p

• I dislike restrictions.

• I discover a new and different kind of Love.

• I cannot stand high-pitched voice…like seriously, a no-no.

• I learned that at work and in life, no matter how good you are to people…and how much effort you put into the things you do (for yourself or for others), there are bound to be a few people who just CANNOT be pleased.

• Most people are unappreciative of what they already have and are constantly chasing the things they cannot have.

• I am still as indecisive as ever… ;p

• I had my first taste of delicious LOBSTERS while I was in China. I never ever dream of tasting them. However, I had no choice when I was in China…plus it smells and looks delicious ;) and yes, it was delicious.

After 2 – 4 lobsters over 2 days, I think I had allergy reactions few days after that. I couldn’t feel the tip of my tongue for a couple of days. I can’t think of other logical explanations except for that. Lol.

• I seriously procrastinate.

• I love babies.

• I have poor SELF-MANAGEMENT skills.

• I was told that I am a lil bit toooo friendly…hence I must work to be more serious.

• I hate public speaking.

• I was told that I put other people’s needs too much ahead of mine. Thus I need to learn to put my needs first before others.

But I’m like thinking…’How do I do that’? ...*still thinking*

• And the list goes on and on and on….will add up more to the list soon… ****



THINGS TO WORK ON IN 2010

REPRIORITIZE

FOCUS ON TIME MANAGEMENT

DO NOT LET WORK RULE MY LIFE

MAKE MORE TIME FOR ‘SELF’ / FAMILY

POLISH MY PRESENTATION SKILLS

WORK ON MY CONFIDENCE

SAVE UP

BE MORE ORGANIZE

DON’T SAY ANYTHING IF I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO SAY

TRY TO EXERCISE AND BE HEALTHY

AIM TO REACH MY TARGET BY THE END OF 2010 ;)

--- MORE TO COME ---

XXX

Crime Investigation

I am watching crime investigation now.

Case 1

A man killed his wife and buried her 3 feet underground. When the police came around and was searching for his wife's body, he was sitting in the kitchen eating his spaghetti.

When the police found the body of his wife, he said how did u managed to find her...while eating his spaghettti.

And when the police wanted to bring him in for question....he said he wants to finish off his spaghetti first before they bring him.

Im amazed!!!

Case 2

A woman drowned her very young kids...not 1, but all the 7 of them.

Police: Why did you drowned them?

Woman: ...so that God will still accept them while they are young.

Police: Why did you say that?

Woman: they are naughty and disrespectful...disobedience.

Police: Example?

Woman: When her mother in law (the kids granny) comes to visit them, they will call her names and doesnt listen.

Thus she wants them to go...before they grow up and go to hell.

Scary huh...

xxx

..Just thinking...

How can one be soo unappreciative? Its amazing how just by doing one mistake, all the other good things you have done = erased.

Maybe its human nature...greediness...wanting all to oneself....wanting everything to be perfect..
when that person isnt perfect at all...

Its amazing how one can never be satisfied with the things that they have. Sometimes, its to the point of being 'inda bersyukur' di atas all the nikmat given. Sad to say, but its reality.

Cant a person just be happy with what he/she already has?

Cant a person just accept that not everyone is as motivated/hardworking/'purrfect' as the others?

What u want doesnt mean the other person wants it as well...
the things that makes u happy does not necessarily makes another person happy...

Stop judging people....it doesnt make u perfect.

Just imagine if ur 'nikmat' is pull away from you...
how would u sustain life as the way it is currently?
How can u survive when u r not even thankful of ur present state?
And how would u feel if people start judging u...based on that??

Nauzubillah...lets pray that Allah will keep our pintu rezeki wide open..and remind us to be thankful.

Amin!!

xxx

She saw herself on my laptop

Look at it and continued eating her porridge

Look again and saw herself

Climbed up the sofa

Crawl slowly and closer

still inda puas hati...

move in closer to investigate...

Curiousity is good!!

ILIA, UBD

I am currently attending a 2 weeks course/workshop at the Institute of Leadership, Innovation and Advancement (dont quote me on this but if my memory serves me right, that is what its call) at UBD.

The building is new and nice..has contemporary concept and hopefully it will be well maintain and not be 'run-down' like certain parts of UBD..;p

Theres 80 of us in total and so far its been interesting especially the first two days when we were talking about Leadership. The third and fourth day is so-so as we covered the module on Strategic Thinking.

I am looking forward for Saturday and Monday as the module will be about Financial Management...:)..to be delivered by one of the lecturers from FBEPS, UBD.

Being here...makes me miss being a student. I wish I can be one...however, work is one of the phases of life we have to go through...so I have to make the best out of it since I don't know how long I will be capable of staying in the workforce - mentally and physically - but hopefully murah rezeki.

Anyway, I wont go on about it. Maybe I will write more about it in my next post..;p

xxx

Begin ur days with coffee...

Nothing beats that...;)

xxx

Why do we have to please everyone..when they dont seem to care to reciprocate and take ur feelings into account?

I dont think I have the answer to this one.

its like...can you do this for me? i said ok.

can you pls take this to bla bla bla? i said ok.

but when it comes to my turn....

can you this for me? ok...(but it never gets done)

get me this pls...ok...but its never there.

it makes it harder for me to rely on people.

I feel that I always care about others feelings...

but when it comes to mine, who cares???

so why do I have to decide on things to please others??

tell me coz i dont understand.

xxx

A new beginning???

Working life has not been that great.. a small office with soo many untold stories..unwanted politics..unwelcomed backstabbing.. and the demotivation experience every few months doesnt help either.. and on top of that, I discovered that one of my colleagues has been gossiping about me.. stuffs that are not true of course; however I guess I am 'surviving'.

Perhaps time will 'heal' all..?? hopefully.

Anyway, we have a new girl, our Senior Research Officer (SRO) who will head our unit. She is heavily pregnant and will be with us for atleast three weeks before she goes on her maternity leave.

She is soft spoken and seems interested to know about our role and function in the Ministry. She seem interested to want to hear it from us first before she meets BOSS on Monday. She expressed ideas that are somehow similar to ours (my colleague and I) which is good..and she voice out changes that she might want to introduce once she 'settle down' which will most probably be early next year.

So fingers cross...hopefully things will turn out for the better..and perhaps a new beginning for our unit. Aminnnn!!

xxx

We, the female species, are special...just read the following I extracted online. Isn't it great to be created for this purpose? I certainly think so.


Woman was made from the rib of man
She was not created from his head to top him
Nor from his feet to be stepped upon
She was made from his side to be close to him
From beneath his arm to be protected by him
Near his heart to be loved by him

Malay Translation

Sesungguhnya wanita dijadikan dari rusuk kiri lelaki
Dia bukan dicipta dari kepala ke kaki
juga bukan dari tapak kaki
Wanita dicipta dari sebelah kiri rusuk lelaki
supaya dia hampir kepada kamu (lelaki)
lengan lelaki dicipta untuk mempertahankan wanita
dekat dengan hati lelaki untuk disayangi.

This is hilarious guys...saw it on youtube last month...been hooked on it since...
obviously the guys in this video was really bored at work..haha..enjoy ;)



xxx

…

There are certain things in life that you can’t and shouldn’t return to…and sometimes these are the things you missed the most. You don’t talk about it but it’s always at the back of your mind. You don’t talk about it but certain things / places/ people just remind you of it.

At this moment, I miss the presence of ____ . I don’t talk about it as much as I think I cope better without talking about it. When you talk…it makes you think more…and the feedback you get might make you think more deeply. But if you keep it to yourself, although you think about it…but because there are no feedback, then you keep on burying it in…deeper and deeper. And atleast you move on without people saying…’ eh, u said bla bla bla…etc etc.

It is hard to resist the urge not to remain in touch…to drop a text…or an email…especially when details of ____ are laid down in front of you. However, sometimes you have to remind yourself not to fall back into that path after repeatedly being sucked in…with no positive result.

It makes me wonder what is it do I miss so much about ____?
Why do I believe there is still hope though it is clear there is none?
Why do I keep on looking back at it though I have taken huge steps forward?

I have to admit sometimes it does not help me at all when people inform me random updates related to ____. Of course there are times I want to know what is up / happening though there are times when I rather resist the temptation. And when I am given random updates about ____, it is easier to reserve you thoughts and feelings about it and reply with short and quick answer.

There are times when I wish we are still in touch…there are times when I wish ____ would surprise me with a call…an email…a text… though that would be like digging my own grave.

Anyway, despite whatever…I will remain silent as this is the best way I know I can cope. Talking does not necessarily solve it. It just complicates things especially when those around you claim their way is the most ideal way of dealing with things. It complicates things in your heart and head. It adds up to your worry. It makes you feel unsure and guilty…and that is the last thing you want.

For now, I guess the best thing is to hold on, be patience, pray and it will go away eventually, if not now.

Mantra of the day: When things do not go your way…when things we like / love is taken away from us, there might be something better in store for us.

xxx

...

We had a meeting tadi discussing various issues and challenges we are facing as a deparment.

Then come to logistics and our monthly collection...ada tia issue sabun siapa yang mesti order..and this sabun is to be place in every single toilet..then come the issue of 'inda kana layan' by the department who is responsible to respond to our request for sabun and all the other things..

sabun punya pasal voices are raised to the point of sakit telinga...i literally had to place one of my fingers into my left ear to minimize the impact of their "shouting voice"..each wanting their point to go across and each wanting the other to agree with their way...

then ada tia the issue pasal pangkat...its amazing huh?..i was certainly amazed how one can be so 'hierarchical' in their head..hmm..

more issues about..coffee break and money issue..and setting up a new fund khas for sedekah and charity purposes and atu pun no one can agree on the amount to be given.

One of them wants it to be institutionalise and each of the staffs must pay according to their salary scale and me and some others wants to have a tabung sedekah where it is there and its up to us to masukkan berapa kami mau...which i believe fits the purpose of sedekah and megikut keikhlasan hati..in the end, the agreed price is $3 minimum every month.

Everyone agreed to this..so its fine...as long as its not institutionalize as i personally think it bets the purpose of sedekah. Mind you..our monthly collection for our coffee break everyday sudah mengikut our scale gaji.. imagine having two tabung that we have to pay according to our scale?? ngalih saja buat dua kali kerja to audit it every month...

Anyway, the point is...we are a small department and yet everyone cant seem to agree..imagine a bigger group...which might be a disaster if sorang sorang with their PL (hehe...a word Ive learned since working..hehe)

basically the word to describe work = CHAOTIC!!!

xxx

Which one should it be?

xxx

I want to move out!!

I cant seem to motivate myself here and be enthusiastic about the things I do.

Everything just seems so wrong here..

the atmosphere...environment...etc...etc...etc...

my brain cells seems to be shrinking in size..

zero productivity...zero creativity...zero motivation...

but I'm feeling 120 percent of the negativity around me...

ppl being unhappy...demotivated...not wanting to do anything...but talk talk talk...

sounds so dramatic, I know...

but thats how I've been feeling..

need to go away!!

xxx

Another quiz..;)

Your Working Style

You have a great deal of warmth, but may not show it until you know a person well. You keep your warm side inside, like a fur-lined coat. When you are care, you care deeply, but are more likely to show your feeling by deeds rather than words. You are very faithful to duties and obligations related to things or people you care about.
You take a very personal approach to life, judging everything by your inner ideals and personal values. You stick to your values with passionate conviction, but can be influenced by someone you care deeply about. Although your inner loyalties and ideals govern your lives, you find these hard to talk about. Your deepest feelings are seldom expressed; your inner tenderness is masked by quiet reserve.

In everyday activities you are tolerant, open-mind, flexible, and adaptable. If one of your inner loyalties is threatened, though, you will not give an inch. You usually enjoy the present moment, and do not like to spoil it by rushing to get thing done. You have little wish to impress or dominate. The people you prize the most are those who take the time to understand your values and the goals you are working toward.

You are interested mainly in the realities brought to you by your senses, both inner and outer. You are apt to enjoy fields where taste, discrimination, and a sense of beauty and proportion are important. You have a special love of nature and a sympathy with animals. You often excel in craftsmanship and the work of your hands is usually more eloquent than words.

You are twice as good when working at a job that you believe in, since your feeling adds energy to your efforts. You see the needs of the moment and try to meet them. You want your work to contribute to something that matters to you-- human understanding, happiness, or health. You want to have a purpose beyond your paycheck, no matter how big the check. You are a perfectionist whenever you deeply care about something, and are particularly suited for work that requires both devotion and a large measure of adaptability.

The problem for you is that you may feel such a contrast between your inner ideals and your actual accomplishments that you may burden yourself with a sense of inadequacy. This can be true even when you are being as effective as others. You take for granted anything you do well and are the most modest of all the types, tending to underrate and understate yourself.

It is important for you to find practical ways to express your ideals; otherwise you will keep dreaming of the impossible and accomplish very little. If you find no actions to express your ideal, you can become too sensitive and vulnerable, with dwindling confidence in life and in yourself. Actually, you have much to give and need only to find the spot where you are needed.

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Suitable careers:
artist
beautician
botanist
carpenter
clerical worker
computer operator
counselor
dancer
dental and medical assistant
designer
dietician or nutritionist
factory worker
food service worker
forester
gardener
geologist
marine biologist
mechanic
nurse
occupational therapist
optician
physical therapist
police officer
recreation leader
secretary
teacher
veterinarian or assistant

WHICH ONE DO YOU THINK WOULD SUIT ME BEST? ;)

---xxx---

...Tried a few online quizzes...

GETTING TO KNOW MYSELF BETTER.

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend - you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

I was browsing through my posts...and there were a few unpublished post. One of it is as shown below:

Normally..

I would be ok if things doesnt go as planned...

I would be more laid back...

more reserved...

keep my thoughts to myself...

have more patience...

more of a good listener...

more content with things...

accepting of things around...



But NOW...

I get easily annoyed with things...

dont understand why ppl like to complicate things...

I get depressed...

Im easily turned off...

angry...

say things without thinking...


***end***

I was surprise to read this as I dont remember this particular entry dated 9 December...however, everything is fresh now in my mind as I was trying to recall why I was feeling that way..hmm..let bygones be bygones.

---xxx---